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Fanatic Envy
O happy, confident, charming, handsome man.
So magnetic is your presence. So seductive
is your gaze. People flock to you and throw
upon your alter all of their love. I hate
you. I hate you because you have never had
to suffer. Suffering is as alien to you as
your happiness is to me. Your fortune
permeates out of you the same way my misery
oozes out of me. Man of beauty and talent,
what kind of devilish God has deemed it
necessary to taunt me with your grace? I
hate you, and spit on your benevolent
visage. You and your followers gaze upon me
like an unholy monstrosity, like some
abominable thing that is entirely beneath
you. You shun me for being a broken human
being. Why has fortune favored you, and not
me? O happy and joyous man! Hear me! I
want to see you shattered! I want to stand
on all of your broken dreams. I want to see
your God forsake you, and your followers
turn and devour you! O shining beacon of a
man, I want you to know what it is like to
be me! You should know what it feels like
to have your candle snuffed out over and
over again. I want to see you suffer until
all you know is darkness, and can no longer
comprehind what it means to shine!
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